


Offically the Worst Maid Ever

by snafumoofins



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-26
Updated: 2015-09-26
Packaged: 2018-04-23 13:28:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4878625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snafumoofins/pseuds/snafumoofins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When he first met 'Belle' French, Rumplestiltskin was completely ecstatic. He'd surely scare the wits out of the thing, wouldn't he? She'd probably run the moment she entered his home, yanking out handfuls of hair! However, she isn't at all Belle and she isn't at all scared. AKA Lacey is the one Rumple takes as his maid and she isn't afraid of him at all and is lazy and horrible and yes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Offically the Worst Maid Ever

Things had been running splendidly, _oh_ , he had thought, _this would be entertaining indeed_! The daughter of Avonlea, Lord Maurice’s precious little feather had quite some bark to her, oh _yes_. 

The thing had stood before him, ever-so-boldly, even dared to her betrothed and father a bit of lip before her dramatic, no, _their_ dramatic exit. For all she knew, she was off to the monster’s cave. Off to a life of servitude and torture. 

He remembered being so gleeful, so very proud of himself. He was going to scare the wits out of little Belle French. 

But he’d been so wrong. So very wrong. 

The moment he had started to list off her chores-he was _so_ sure that they would terrify her-she uttered a loud, booming yawn, nearly tipping the tray of porcelain she carried.

A _yawn_. _He_ was the Dark One. He had the capability of destroying half of the forest with a simple wave of his hand. _She_ was nothing more than pretty little face. 

His distaste had been obvious, as the thing arched a brow in a way that unsettled him. Why would such a naive little lord’s daughter be so...

He swallowed back his ire and chose to instead use it, waiting for the moment she plucked a cup of tea to place before him to add: “Skin the children I hunt for their pelts,” to her list. 

He’d nearly screeched with glee as she dropped the cup entirely, crouching immediately with a rather unladylike grunt and examining the thing. 

Rumple had almost tipped his chair from leaning so far to see the expression of horror on her face, but her head was bowed. 

“I’m...s-so sorry...” now _that_ was better, her voice was entirely fragile, “It’s...” 

All Rumplestilskin had heard was the clang of the cup hitting the ground, looking to find that the woman held up one digit in particular. 

He’d recalled the use of the same digit by lesser beings. Usually the crowd one Captain Jones had preferred. The message wasn’t at all unclear by her action. _Sod off_ , but her face was unflinching. She was even _smiling_. 

_Who_ was she? Or rather, _what_ was she? This was no dainty little maiden, off to be eaten by the dragons and rescued by her prince, no, no, this was...a _vixen_ , a _leech_ , a...a...bloodsucking little _cow_. 

It was that moment of unrelenting... _middle-finger...ness_ , that Rumplestiltskin knew he was very well... _screwed._

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by tumblr. Feel free to prompt me at snafu-moofins.tumblr.com


End file.
